You might already have read this from another friend’s blog or forwarded email. These have been old jokes but they remain funny (after all). I commented every line so every time someone would cut and face this post on his or her blog, I would be immortal. Sana kayanin nyo pa ulit ang pagtawa.

Anulled and void
[Ah, broken marriage...]

Are you joking my leg?
[Baka namanlong-legged legs pa yan. Ayos!]

Are you sure ka na ba?
[Blame Kris Aquino. ]

Base-to-base casis
[Anongbase ka nga ulit?]

Been there, been that.
[You must been everywhere... hahaha]

Beneath the belt
[Kung paano daw ako humirit. Nasaktan ba kita?]

Burn the bridge when you get there.
[Burn the bushes sabi ng officemate namin...]

Can you repeat that for the second time around once more from the top?
[Napagod ako dun ah. It's sweater than second time around.]

Can you repeat it once again?
[Isa ka pa!]

Can’t you just cut me some slacks?
[Straight cut?]

C’mon let’s join us!
[C'mon c'mon naman yan.]

Don’t touch me not!
[Noli Me Tange Ire]

Do you have more brighter ideas?
[Nagdilim ang paligid ko ah.]

First and for all.
[Last and for least...]

For all intense and purposes.
[Ka-tense ito.]

Forget it about it.
[Okay, I'll forgive it about it too.]

Get the most of both worlds.
[Makamundong nilalang ka!]

Give him the benefit of the daw.
[Ano daw?]

Hello?… For a while, please hang yourself…
[Wait! Hindi na ako makahinga. Sandali lang. HHEL--. Busy dial tone.]

Hi. I’m , What’s yours?
[Bwelo muna kasi, By the way I'm, what's yours dapat]

How much is the kidney meal?
[Kidney ni Jollibee ang ni-donate.]

I can’t take it anymore of this!
[I can't too!]

I couldn’t care a damn!
[Darn!]

I ran into some errands.
[Ano daan papuntang errands?]

If worse comes to shove.
[The shove comes worst.]

I’m only human nature.
[Oo nga naman, nagkakamali din anghuman nature.]

I’m very iterated!
[Naku! Takbo! Galit na siya!]

I’m sorry, my boss just passed away.
[Ah... umalis lang. Mabubuhay pa daw ba siya?]

In the wink of an eye.
[croons "Kisapmata"]

It’s a blessing in the sky.
[Google search "blessing in the sky", hindi ka lang nag-iisa.]

It’s a no-win-win situation.
[Pangit nga naman kasi kung lose-lose.]

It’s as brand as new.
[Anong brand nga 'to?]

It’s not my problem anymore! It’s your problem anymore!
[Parang minumura mo ako ha. Anymore rin.]

Let’s give them a big hand of applause.
[Horror ito.]

My answers have been prayered.
[Buti naman na-gets Niya.]

None ID. Nothing Entry.
[I have no to say more.]

Now and there.
[Hear and then.]

One of these days is not like the other.
["in another" pala ito - HP ERP joke]

Please me alone!
[Shut your up!]

Right there and right then.
[Kanina ka pa ha.. I'm starting to get iterated.]

So far, so good, so far.
[So?]

So… what’s a beautiful girl like you?….
[Napaghalo yunglyrics.]

Take things first at a time.
[First and fourth most.]

That’s what I’m talking about it.
[Talk to my finger 'coz you don't deserve a hand.]

The feeling is actual.
[Actual understanding pala.]

The more the manyer.
[The more entries you send the manyer chances of winning.]

The sky’s the langit.
[Di kita ma-reach. Taas mo, pre!Heaven!]

Well well well. Look do we have here!
[Well...]

What are friends are for?
[Sisihin ang kanta.]

What happened after the erection of the volcano?
[Ano bang lumalabas diyan sa erection? Siyempre lava. Kayo talaga!]

What is the next that is?
[Next entry.]

What is the world is coming to?
[End?]

Whatever you say so.
[Whatever!]

What’s your next class before this?
[Mapapaaga dropping nito.]

Where’d you came from?
[Saang planeta ka galing?]

You can never can tell.
[Destiny. Comical nga lang.]

You want to have your cake and bake it too.
[Parang si Wendy ah. Kung gusto mong magbreakfast, magluto ka.]

You’re barking at the wrong dog.
[Sit, tree, sit.]

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• Foreign Films Tagalized Part 2
• Meet My New Classmates
• Creative Pinoy Shops and Restaurants
• Cheap Pinoy Song Hits
• Engalog. An English-Tagalog Translation.
• Creative Pinoy Value Meals
• Mga Kasabihan at Salawikain
• Pinoy Pickup Lines
• Foreign Films Tagalized Part 1
• Call Center Interview Lines

I’m not sure if this was really a menu in a restaurant near the NAIA airport. Check out their menu. As you go on, it’s becoming more interesting and more flavorful.

1. TapSiLog – Tapa, Sinangag, Itlog
2. LongSiLog – Longganisa, Sinangag, Itlog
3. HotSiLog – Hotdog, Sinangag, Itlog
4. PorkSiLog – Pork, Sinangag, Itlog
5. ChickSiLog – Chicken, Sinangag, Itlog
6. AzuCarera – Adobong Aso
7. LugLog – Lugaw, Itlog
8. PaKapLog – Pandesal, Kape, Itlog
9. KaLog – Kanin, Itlog
10. PaKaLog – Pandesal, Kanin, Itlog
11. MaaLog na BetLog – Maalat na Itlog, Pakbet, Itlog
12. BaHaw – Bakang Inihaw
13. KalKal – Kalderetang Kalabaw
14. HiMas – Hipon Malasado
15. HiMas SuSo – Hipon Malasado, Sugpo, Keso
16. HiMas PekPek – Hipon Malasado, Kropek, Pinekpekan
17. PekPek Mong MaLaKi – Kropek, Pinekpekan, Monggo, Malasado, Laing, Kilawin
18. DiLa – Dinuguan, Laing
19. DiLaAn Mo – Dinuguan, Laing, Dalandan, Molo
20. BoKa BoKa – Bopis, Kanin, Bokayo, Kape
21. BoKa BoKa Mo Pa – Bopis, Kanin, Bokayo, Kape, Molong Pancit
22. KanToT – Kanin, Tortang, Talong
23. KanToT Pa – Kanin, Tortang Talong, Pancit
24. SiGe KanToT Pa – Sinigang na Pige, Kanin, Tortang Talong, Pancit
25. SiGe KanToT Pa iBaon mo – Sinigang na Pige, Kanin, Tortang Talong, Pancit… Take out
26. SiGe KanToT Pa Ha – Sinigang na Pige, Kanin, Tortang Talong, Pancit, Halo-halo
27. SiGe KanToT Pa iBaon mo Papa! – Sinigang na Pige, Kanin, Tortang Talong, Pancit… Take out with Ketchup
28. PaKanToT – Pandesal, Kanin, Tortang Talong
29. PaPaKanToT – Papaitan, Kanin, Tortang Talong
30. PaPaKanToT Ka Ba – Papaitan, Kanin, Tortang Talong, Kapeng Barako
31. PaKanToT Sa ‘Yo – Pandesal, Kanin, Tortang Talong, Saging + Yosi
32. PaKanToT Ka – Pandesal, Kanin, Tortang Talong, Kape
33. PaKanToT Ka habang MaTiGAs Pa – Pandesal, Kanin, Tortang Talong, Kape, Inihaw na Bangus, Maruya, Tinola, Ginisang Aso, Pancit [Super Meal!!!]
34. SuBo – Sugpo, Bopis
35. SuBo Mo – Sugpo, Bopis, Molo
36. SuBo Mo Pa – Sugpo, Bopis, Molo, Pancit
37. SuBo Mo Pa MaiGe – Sugpo, Bopis, Molo, Mais, Pige
38. SuBo Mo TiTe Ko – Sugpo, Bopis, Tinola, Teryaki, Kochinta
39. SuBo Mo TiTe Ko BiLis – Sugpo, Bopis, Tinola Teryaki, Kochinta, Bihon, Tawilis
40. SuBo Mo TiTe Ko BiLis, HAYOP! – same as #39, minura mo lang yung waiter kasi ang tagal ng order.

Possibly Related Posts:

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• Meet My New Classmates
• Creative Pinoy Shops and Restaurants
• Cheap Pinoy Song Hits
• Engalog. An English-Tagalog Translation.
• The Sky’s The Langit
• Mga Kasabihan at Salawikain
• Pinoy Pickup Lines
• Foreign Films Tagalized Part 1
• Call Center Interview Lines

… na nabago na ng panahon at ng Pinoy at ni Ai-ai De Las Alas sa Tanging Ina Nyong Lahat!

Aanhin ang palasyo kung ang nakatira ay kuwago, mabuti pa ang bahay kubo, sa paligid ay puno ng linga.

Ako ang nagsaing… iba ang kumain. Diet ako eh.

An apple a day is too expensive.

An apple a day makes seven apples a week.

Ang buhay ay parang bato, it’s hard.

Ang buhay ay parang gulong, minsan nasa ibabaw, minsan nasa vulcanizing shop.

Ang hindi marunong magmahal sa sariling wika, lumaki sa ibang bansa.

Ang naglalakad ng matulin, late na sa appointment.

Ang taong di marunong lumingon sa kanyang pinanggalingan… ay may stiff neck.

Ang taong nagigipit … sa bumbay kumakapit.

Ang taong naglalakad nang matulin… may utang.

Batu-bato sa langit, ang tamaan… sapul.

Behind the clouds are the other clouds.

Better late than later.

Better late than pregnant.

Birds of the same feather make a good feather duster.

Birds of the same feather that prays together … stays together.

Do unto others … then run!!!

Hindi lahat ng kumikinang ay ginto … muta lang yan.

Huli man daw at magaling, undertime pa rin.

Huwag magbilang ng manok kung alaga mo ay itik.

It’s better to cheat than to repeat!

Kapag ang puno mabunga … mataba ang lupa!

Kapag maikli ang kumot, tumangkad ka na!

Kapag maiksi na ang kumot, bumili ka na ng bago.

Kapag may sinuksok at walang madukot, may nandukot.

Kapag may tiyaga, may nilaga. Kapag may taga, may tahi.

Kapag puno na ang salop, kumuha na ng ibang salop.

Magbiro ka na sa lasing, magbiro ka na sa bagong gising, huwag lang sa lasing na bagong gising.

Matalino man ang matsing, matsing pa rin.

No guts, no glory… no ID, no entry.

No man is an island because time is gold.

Pag may usok … may nag-iihaw.

Pagkahaba haba man ng prusisyon … mauubusan din ng kandila.

To err is human, to errs is humans.

Try and try until you succeed… or else try another.

Walang matigas na tinapay sa gutom na tao.

When all else fails, follow instructions.

When it rains … it floods.

Possibly Related Posts:

• Foreign Films Tagalized Part 2
• Meet My New Classmates
• Creative Pinoy Shops and Restaurants
• Cheap Pinoy Song Hits
• Engalog. An English-Tagalog Translation.
• The Sky’s The Langit
• Creative Pinoy Value Meals
• Pinoy Pickup Lines
• Foreign Films Tagalized Part 1
• Call Center Interview Lines

Minamalat na naman ang puso ko.
Paano kasi, laging sinisigaw ang pangalan mo.

Uy, picture tayo!
Para ma-develop tayo!

Lecture mo ba ako?
Lab kasi kita.

Pwede ba kita maging driver?
Para ikaw na magpapatakbo ng buhay ko.

Pinaglihi ka ba sa keyboard?
Kasi type kita.

I hate to say this, but… you are like my underwear.
‘Coz i can’t last a day without you!

P’wede ba kitang maging sidecar?
Single kasi ako eh.

May lisensya ka ba?
‘Coz you’re driving me crazy.

May kilala ka bang gumagawa ng relo?
May sira ata relo ko. Pag ikaw kasi kasama ko, humihinto ang oras.

Am I a bad shooter?
‘Coz i keep on missing you.

Naniniwala ka ba sa love at first sight?
O gusto mong dumaan ulit ako?

Mabilis ka siguro sa mga puzzle noh?
Kasi kakasimula pa lang ng araw ko, pero nabuo mo na agad.

Excuse me, are you a dictionary?
Because you give meaning to my life.

Bangin ka ba?
Nahuhulog kasi ako sa’yo.

Pustiso ka ba?
Kasi i can’t smile without you.

Pagod na pagod ka na noh?
Maghapon at magdamag ka na kasing tumatakbo sa isipan ko eh.

Anong height mo?
Ha?! Pano ka nagkasya sa loob ng puso ko?

Sana T na lang ako.
Para I’m always right next to U

Are you Jamaican??
Kasi Ja-maican me crazy!!

Ako ay isang exam.
Kaya sagutin mo na ako.

Hinde tayo tao. Hinde tayo hayop.
Bagay tayo. Bagay talaga tayo.

Ikaw ba may-ari ng Crayola?
Ikaw kasi nagbibigay ng kulay sa buhay ko.

Kung ikaw ay bola at ako ang player, mashu-shoot ba kita?
Hindi, para lagi kita mamimiss.

Can i take your picture?
Coz i want to show Santa exactly what i want for Christmas!

Exam ka ba?
Gustong gusto na kasi kitang i-take home eh!

Mahilig ka ba sa asukal?
Ang tamis kasi ng mga ngiti mo.

Ibibili kita ng salbabida.
Kasi malulunod ka sa pagmamahal ko.

Grabe nakakatawa yung mga pick-up lines noh? hahaha! May alam ka pa bang iba?
Wala na akong maisip eh.
Coz all i ever think of is you.

I’m a bee.
Can you be my honey?

Nakakatakot di ba ang multo?
Pero mas nakakatakot kapag nawala ka sa buhay ko.

May butas ba puso mo?
Kasi natrap na ako sa loob, can’t find my way out!

Hey, did you fart?
Coz you blew me away!

Favorite subject mo ba Geometry.
Kasi kahit saang angle ka tignan ang ganda mo eh!

I know! I know! This page is getting lengthy to the max! Visit this site that features the best pickup lines ever produced in this thread! Promise – no duplicates, rewritten, much cooler!

Possibly Related Posts:

• Foreign Films Tagalized Part 2
• Meet My New Classmates
• Creative Pinoy Shops and Restaurants
• Cheap Pinoy Song Hits
• Engalog. An English-Tagalog Translation.
• The Sky’s The Langit
• Creative Pinoy Value Meals
• Mga Kasabihan at Salawikain
• Foreign Films Tagalized Part 1
• Call Center Interview Lines

1. Black Hawk Down – Ibong Maitim sa Ibaba
2. Dead Man’s Chest – Dodo ng Patay
3. I Know What You Did Last Summer – Uy! Aminin!
4. Love, Actually – Sa Totoo Lang, Pag-ibig
5. Million Dollar Baby – 50 Milyon Pisong Bata (it depends on the exchange rate)
6. The Blair Witch Project – Ang Proyekto ng Bruhang si Blair
7. Mary Poppins – Si Mariang May Putok
8. Snakes on a Plane – Nag-ahasan sa Ere
9. The Postman Always Rings Twice – Ang Kartero Kapag Dumundot Dalawang Beses
10. Sum of All Fears – Takot Mo, Takot Ko, Takot Nating Lahat
11. Swordfish – Talakitok
12. Pretty Woman – Ganda ng Lola Mo
13. Robin Hood, Men in Tights – Si Robin Hood at ang mga Felix Bakat
14. Four Weddings and a Funeral – Kahit Apat na Beses Ka Pang Magpakasal, Mamamatay Ka Rin
15. The Good, the Bad and the Ugly – Ako, Ikaw, Kayong Lahat
16. Harry Potter and the Sorcerers Stone – Adik si Harry, Tumira ng Shabu
17. Click – Isang Pindot Ka Lang
18. Brokeback Mountain – May Nawasak sa Likod ng Bundok ng Tralala / Bumigay sa Bundok
19. The Day of the Dead – Ayaw Tumayo ng Mga Patay
20. Waterworld – Basang-basa
21. There’s Something About Mary – May Kuwan sa Ano ni Maria
22. Employee of the Month – Ang Sipsip
23. Resident Evil – Ang Biyenan
24. Kill Bill – Kilitiin sa Bilbil
25. The Grudge – Lintik Lang ang Walang Ganti
26. Nightmare Before Christmas – Bangungot Sa Noche Buena
27. Never Been Kissed – Pangit Kasi
28. Gone in 60 Seconds – One Round, Tulog
29. The Fast and the Furious – Ang Bitin, Galit
30. Too Fast and Too Furious – Kapag Sobrang Bitin, Sobrang Galit
31. Dude, Where’s My Car – Dong, Anong Level Ulit Tayo Nagpark?
32. Beauty and the Beast – Ang Asawa Ko at Ang Nanay Niya
33. The Lord of the Rings – Ang Alahero

Bitin? Here is the sequel.

Possibly Related Posts:

• Foreign Films Tagalized Part 2
• Meet My New Classmates
• Creative Pinoy Shops and Restaurants
• Cheap Pinoy Song Hits
• Engalog. An English-Tagalog Translation.
• The Sky’s The Langit
• Creative Pinoy Value Meals
• Mga Kasabihan at Salawikain
• Pinoy Pickup Lines
• Call Center Interview Lines